THE CHEAP SEATS with STEVE CAMERON: On Riley, and the mess in Oakland

Yes, it’s an odd way to start an odds-and-ends column.

In fact, discussing a proxy fight involving assorted billionaires is almost a complete no-go in this space.

I mean, do you care about the battle over two seats on Disney’s board of directors?

Well, in this case, maybe you do.

On Wednesday, Disney shareholders firmly rejected an attempt by activist investor Nelson Peltz to access those two precious seats.

Instead, current CEO Bob Iger stays in command, not just in numbers but with the decision establishing a vote of confidence in Iger’s plan for the company.

Why does this matter to us (assuming we’re not Mouse shareholders)?

I’ll turn the quick explanation over to Front Office Sports: “With ESPN, (Disney’s) existing plan also includes the development of a stand-alone, direct-to-consumer version of the network debuting next year; a new sports betting partnership with Penn Entertainment; a potential partial equity sale; and a much-debated streaming joint venture with Fox and Warner Bros. Discovery.

“That direct-to-consumer version of ESPN will also be made available through Disney+, the company said in its annual shareholder meeting.”

If you’re thinking there’s going to be another video streaming charge on your credit card, congratulations.

You can start saving now.

ITEM: People close to college hoops believe that Washington State made a good hire in grabbing Eastern Washington’s David Riley as the Cougs’ next basketball coach.

Wazzu has taken a lot of hits lately, with athletic director Pat Chun scurrying off to UW — a move that produced a distinct odor — and coach Kyle Smith accepting the Stanford job.

Smith’s move is completely different, a lifetime opportunity in the area he’s hoped to work, at a school he called “one of one.”

The fallout, though, after a 25-win season and Wazzu’s first NCAA tournament spot since 2008, has gotten more painful by the minute.

No less than 10 players from that team — including star guard Myles Rice — have hit the transfer portal.

There are just four scholarship players remaining, and only two (junior wing Jaylen Wells and freshman guard Isaiah Watts) were active this year.

Freshman guard Parker Gerrits and freshman forward Spencer Mahoney both redshirted.

Needless to say, the portal runs in two directions, so Riley and his staff will doubtless get busy restocking the roster.

It’s worth noting that all the WSU players in the portal still may remain as Cougs, and we can assume that Riley is recruiting them.

The destination of Rice, the cancer survivor who was named Pac-12 Freshman of the Year, will be interesting.

It would be a surprise if Smith weren’t hoping to lure him to Stanford.

Riley would surely love to keep him in Pullman, for that matter.

Meanwhile, no new athletic director has been named, with interim AD Anne McCoy in charge for the moment.

Wazzu is fortunate in one sense, since university president Kirk Schulz has lots of savvy in the world of intercollegiate athletics.

The prez may be helping run the ship for a while.

ITEM: Every year, I’m waiting and hoping for a sports-themed April Fool’s joke.

A scam that really, really works.

The all-time classic unhinged everyone on April 1, 1985, when legendary sports journalist and author George Plimpton wrote a piece for Sports Illustrated about a stunning free-agent signing by the New York Mets.

The phenom’s name was Sidd (short for Siddhartha) Finch, and he was an aspiring Buddhist monk who played the French horn and pitched with one shoe.

Finch possessed a 168 mile-per-hour fastball that he could command perfectly.

The baseball world bought the story, in part because the Mets were in on it, and a bullpen catcher talked about trying to avoid injuries to his hand when that explosive fastball got to him.

There might never be a better April Fool’s joke — in sports, anyhow — but a contender surfaced this week in Oakland.

Last Dive Bar, an Oakland-based apparel company, has been hammering A’s owner John Fisher with sales of “SELL THE TEAM” merchandise.

But on Monday, a mysterious tweet began swirling around, suggesting that A’s power hitter Brent Rooker had been benched and speedy outfielder Esteury Ruiz sent to Triple-A because the players were wearing LDB wristbands.

LDB…Last Dive Bar…got it?

The theory was that Fisher ordered the wristbands gone, or the players would be punished.

Anyhow, when the story gained some traction, more tweets turned up with famous people wearing LDB wristbands – John F. Kennedy, Jimmy Hoffa, Bigfoot and Jesus Christ.

That SHOULD make anyone realize it’s all a laugh.

But, no!

Plenty of legit news organizations picked up on the “Oakland Conspiracy” — including Sports Illustrated, the birthplace of Sidd Finch.

Geez.

Why did everyone buy this goofy thing?

My theory is that so many people hate John Fisher, they’ll believe anything bad about him.

I just wish they’d put a French horn into the story.

Email: scameron@cdapress.com

Steve Cameron’s “Cheap Seats” columns appear in The Press four times each week, normally Tuesday through Friday unless, you know, stuff happens.

Steve suggests you take his opinions in the spirit of a Jimmy Buffett song: “Breathe In, Breathe Out, Move On.”