THE CHEAP SEATS with STEVE CAMERON: Buddha, the Pac-12, more on Lock, Mariners

Please forgive today’s rather odd introduction, OK?

Thank you.

I promise this column gets better as you rumble along.

Now then, I’ve mentioned at some point that I once lived and worked overseas.

It was a great experience, and I recommend it as worthwhile experience — learning other cultures and seeing America from a distance.

I’m also sure that I’ve prattled on about a love of golf more than once.

It’s impossible that I’ve totally skipped over my birdie on The Coeur d’Alene Resort Course’s famous island green.

You get a signed certificate for that, and I have it on the wall if you’re already thinking of a fib, thank you very much.

OK, so I lived in Scotland, worked in Europe and the Middle East, and I play golf.

Why would that matter at the beginning of a “Notes and Quotes” column?

Well, the whole thing rates a mention because — just like most of you — I get an incredible amount of junk emails that escape the spam filter.

The winner today had this headline: “Investing in Golf Property Overseas for Fun and Profit.”

Do these people think we make the big bucks?

Seriously?

Let’s move on.

ITEM: I also found an email from someone offering to share the calming secrets of Buddha.

Probably should have dug into that one, since I’ve been getting entirely too worked up over the collapse of the Pac-12 Conference.

OK, not the stupid, greed-driven realignment itself, but the embarrassing posture (if we can use that word) of Stanford and California.

I grew up almost exactly halfway between those two renowned universities, and to see their debasement in pursuit of joining a conference on the Atlantic coast, um, seems stunning.

We’d probably already have confirmation that they’ve been accepted by the ACC (for taking just a 30 percent cut of the conference media rights money), but a meeting of ACC presidents set for Monday night was postponed by that fatal shooting on the North Carolina campus.

I’m going to save some of the funnier and more insulting lines regarding Stanford and Cal, in deference to that tragedy.

But they’re coming, along with some ideas about how Washington State and Oregon State can rebuild the Pac-12 all on their own.

Former Coug coach and radio broadcaster Jim Walden has some seriously good thoughts on the subject.

Of course he does.

Former UW coach Don James once made reference to Walden before an Apple Cup game (which Wazzu won) by saying: “I’m a 2,000-word underdog.”

We’ll go over Walden’s plans for the new Pac-12 very, very soon.

Don’t be surprised if something remarkably close to Jim’s scheme winds up coming to life.

Plus, I’ve got to say that ANY conversation with Walden is worth the time it takes out of your life.

I mean, we had a long visit concerning a serious subject, and I’m still giggling.

ITEM: Not sure what to make of the Seahawks’ cutting the active roster to 53 on Tuesday.

Yeah, a lot of names showed up precisely as expected.

There was good news (we think) because almost all the key players who have been rehabbing from injuries made the roster — and if they weren’t going to be ready for action soon, you know, those spots are too important to waste.

The puzzle?

All 10 of this year’s draftees made the cut, along with two undrafted free agents (wide receiver Jake Bobo and long snapper Chris Stoll).

Why didn’t I learn to be a long snapper all those years ago?

It’s VERY unusual that a 10-man draft class would leap to the active roster in one big group.

Even if you really like the guys you selected, normally you’d find at least two or three slipping through to the practice squad.

In the Seahawks’ case, it obviously means they love their picks, but it also alerts you to the possibility that they have quite a few holes that need filling.

Pronto.

Allow me to add one last thought, as we wait for the regular season to open with a bout against the Rams on Sept. 10.

It’s not like I watched the exhibition games with the eyes of a hunting falcon, nor did I pore over game tapes afterward.

But just looking down from the blimp (whoever sponsors it these days), I had the uneasy feeling that I wasn’t as comfortable with Drew Lock as I’d expected to be.

Stay upright, Geno.

ITEM: Unless you’ve gone on a two-month spelunking expedition and never came out for light, you know the Mariners have been hot.

They’ve shot from nowhere to first place in the AL West by running off a 36-14 spree — as of Monday — and the entire Northwest has fallen in love with Julio (The Show) Rodriguez.

The M’s are hitting every pitch they had been missing for months.

But: Did you know that this Seattle pitching staff has a real chance to break a major league record?

Yep.

Not only that, but if you listen to Scott Servais, this is the ONE thing that can allow pitchers to succeed.

The Mariners are throwing first-pitch strikes at a historic rate (64.4 percent).

The record is 64.2.

Each time this is mentioned, I laugh — and not because throwing a first-pitch strike isn’t critical.

Readers of a certain vintage may recall a pitcher for several teams in the 1950s and 60s named Cal McLish.

Cal had chronic arm trouble, but he was good when he was healthy — winning a combined 35 games for Cleveland in 1958-59.

There are some things you need to know about Cal, who was (or insisted he was) a full-blooded Native American from Anadarko, Oklahoma.

First thing would be his full name: Calvin Coolidge Julius Caesar Tuskahoma McLish.

Second thing is the best: After his playing career, Cal spent forever working as a scout and various other things in MLB, and I have vivid memories of seeing him every year at the winter meetings.

Cal enjoyed a cocktail, and a little of the John Barleycorn made him both friendly and CERTAIN of life’s greatest truth.

Every winter, he would roam the hotel lobby, cornering anyone he could intercept — often the same person more than once.

And there I was, the innocent reporter looking for trade news and other tidbits.

Cal would step in front of you, poke you in the chest (always) and say: “What’s the best pitch in baseball?”

Pause for a nanosecond.

Then Cal would shout: “Strike fuing one!!”

Every time this business of the Mariners throwing first-pitch strikes comes up, I’m back in a hotel lobby.

And there’s Cal, hunting me down.

Again.

Sorry, but I’m laughing now and it’s going to last a while.

Cal McLish.

Loved you, brother.

And you were RIGHT!

Email: scameron@cdapress.com

Steve Cameron’s “Cheap Seats” columns appear in The Press four times each week, normally Tuesday through Friday unless, you know, stuff happens.

Steve suggests you take his opinions in the spirit of a Jimmy Buffett song: “Breathe In, Breathe Out, Move On.”

Today’s Quiz: “What’s the best pitch in baseball?”