Appleseed: Why can’t we just have a normal hero?

Some cultures have gallant heroes, flawed or not.

King Arthur may have gone around accepting inappropriately dangerous gifts from strangers in lakes and insisting on uncommonly-shaped tables, but he still made a mostly dashing hero.

But ever desperate to be different, we’ve got ol’ Johnny Appleseed.

The apple man himself isn’t quite the figure the old legends or the Disney flick made him out to be. (Though the barefoot eccentric illustration may have been pretty close.)

John Chapman did make a name for himself. He did go around planting apples and traveling on foot cross-country, around the Midwest and surrounding country anyway.

But as this week’s article on historic apples of Idaho points out, the seeds he was planting had more to do with cultivating hard cider varieties than eating apples. After all, European immigrants and the Americans who descended from them weren’t big water drinkers and relied on fermented fruit juice substitutes, for good reason.

Although I can see why that distinction was glossed over in elementary school timed reading tests. (Would have made them more enjoyable, however. Food for thought, whoever writes those passages.)

The eccentric apple enthusiast was also a missionary of the church of New Jerusalem – a new sect of Christianity founded by Emanuel Swedenborg, whom its adherents believed revealed additional teachings of Christ.

Just as he would sow apples, Chapman would reportedly leave “seeds” of Swedenborg’s teachings, too.

But as much as he liked to spread heavenly messages and give back, Johnny didn’t fail to profit either.

It turns out in the early 1800s, planting cider apple trees on “unclaimed” land is actually a good way to lay a claim to it. And with an already-started orchard on that land, it was likely pretty easy to market to the settlers Chapman sold the plots of land to. The missionary man had a calling in business.

Historians also suspect Chapman fanned the flames of his Appleseed reputation, adding to his own legend in the making. After all, it was the era of the “frontier” mentality and “pioneering” attitudes. (Nevermind who already lived there….)

Like the anti-hero of every conman movie or story, Chapman would apparently stroll into town, wow with his enigma-like personality, tell his (tallish) tales, and then hit the road shortly after. Though we may only guess at whether that was to continue his adventures or to encourage his growing reputation.

An eccentric itinerant orchardist, enterprising missionary of the road, and fan of the…enhanced autobiography has got to be one of the odder true-to-life legends. But I suppose it fits the eccentric enterprising American spirit.