Today's ghastly groaner

While walking past a farm, Fred noticed a pig with a wooden leg.

His curiosity roused, he asked the farmer, “Why does that pig have a wooden leg?”

“Well, that’s a mighty special pig,” the farmer said. “A while back a wild boar attacked me while I was walking in the woods. That pig there came running, went after that boar and chased him away. Saved my life.”

“And the boar tore up the pig’s leg?” Fred asked.

“No,” said the farmer. “He was fine after that. But a bit later we had that fire. Started in the shed up against the barn. Well, that pig started squealing like he was stuck, woke us up, and before we got out here, the darn thing had herded the other animals out of the barn and saved ‘em all.”

“So that’s when he hurt his leg, huh?” Fred asked.

“No,” the farmer said. “He was a might winded, though. And then, when my tractor hit a rock and rolled down the hill into the pond, I was knocked clean out. When I came to, that pig had dove into the pond and dragged me out before I drowned.”

“And that was when he hurt his leg?” Fred asked.

“Oh no,” the farmer said. “He was fine. It cleaned him up, too.”

Fred said, “OK, so just tell me. How did he get the wooden leg?”

“Well,” the farmer said. “A pig like that, you don’t want to eat all at once.”

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Send your groaners to Maureen Dolan, mdolan@cdapress.com. Keep ’em clean, and don’t be mean.