Local prof preaches gospel of controlling our electronic impulses
Courtesy photo Communication professor, author and TEDx speaker Josh Misner points to his book, “Put the F**king Phone Down,” after it launched at the end of May. In this book, Misner shares techniques and activities people can use to unglue from their devices and share more meaningful interpersonal moments. “Some of the most impactful moments in life will not beg for our attention,” Misner said.
With a colorful, attention-grabbing title and content, Josh Misner’s book reminds readers to put down their devices and work on interpersonal communication. (Courtesy photo)
The title alone raises eyebrows.
Believe it or not, Josh Misner's "Put the F**king Phone Down" did not begin with a parent yelling at a teenager.
It was an exchange between Misner and his wife, during what his family calls "The Infamous Costco Incident."
"I ran one of their big orange flatbed carts right into my wife’s ankles," Misner said in an email interview while on a ship off the coast of Mexico the week before Christmas.
"She turned to me and told me to 'put the f**king phone down,' which sparked a heated discussion (AKA, argument) that lasted the rest of the day. During our inflamed dialogue, I came to realize just how much my phone was dominating my attention, which inspired me to do something about it as a husband and father. I thought it appropriate to name the book after that moment that started it all."
Misner is an award-winning communication professor at North Idaho College and is an adjunct faculty member at Lewis-Clark State College and Gonzaga University. He is a TEDx speaker and his writings have been featured in publications including Huffington Post, Time and the Good Men Project.
While some might assume his inspiration came from "watching others stare into their screens while life passes by unnoticed," Misner said the inspiration for the book "was really as a reminder for myself."
"Writing this book was a way for me to process all my stories, experiences and research into the need to be more mindfully present, and as I saw the transformation in my own relationships, I decided this information was too important not to share," he said. "I’ve been experimenting with a lot of the activities and techniques in the book with my students in various courses over the last decade, and this book represents the best of them."
Misner also explained the attention-grabbing title.
"As far as my use of profanity to relay this message, well, I’m a big fan of artful (not gratuitous or excessive) profanity," he said. "Sometimes, no other word will convey the message with enough gusto, and sometimes, it adds an element of levity to an otherwise heavy topic."
In his research for the book, Misner said he was blown away by the connection between boredom and creativity and how screen addiction prevents users from reaching a state of creative boredom.
"Boredom is necessary to access the more creative thought processes in our brains, and when we have our screens constantly begging for our attention, we rarely give ourselves those moments of silent reflection to recharge our mental batteries, so to speak, leading to a lack of creativity, stress, anxiety and even depression," he said. "Then, there’s the more obvious impact on our relationships, where screens replace conversation and can be quite damaging to our face-to-face interpersonal relationships."
And no, it's not just kids who are impacted by the addictive properties of these devices. Misner said it's actually the older generations, the Baby Boomers and the Gen Xers, who are more prone to device addiction because members of those age groups didn't have the benefit of growing up with technology or being taught about its dangers.
"Personally, I think the vast majority of us are just as easily lured into screen addiction, but it’s particularly older generations that are more vulnerable," he said. "As for blame, it's human nature to seek out connection with others as well as information. Nicholas Carr made a compelling argument for this in his book, 'The Shallows: What the Internet is Doing to Our Brains.' However, certain social media and entertainment apps are being specifically designed with this addictive nature in mind to keep people scrolling and clicking as a means to generate more advertising revenue. If we want to break this cycle, it's really up to us to take back control."
Since the book launched in May, Misner has had several positive reviews on Amazon.com as well as feedback from readers, which he openly welcomes.
"To date, the greatest response I’ve gotten was from a couple who told me the book saved their marriage, and I can’t think of a better endorsement than that," he said. "Additionally, some have tweeted thoughts and experiences as they move their way through the activities in the book, so it's been great to see it all unfold!"
Misner said most of all, he wants people to understand that technology is a blessing — but one that needs to be kept in check.
"I will never advocate for the outright destruction of technology, but I do want people to begin understanding the importance of striking a balance and taking back control over their attention spans," he said. "I cannot stress enough the importance of developing that control and the impact of mindful presence on not only our relationships but also our mental and emotional health.
“Some of the most impactful moments in life will not beg for our attention, and there won’t be a notification vibrating in our pockets to remind us to look around. We need to be able to notice those moments that demand our presence most and learn to surrender our presence to those moments."
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"Put the F**king Phone Down" is available on Amazon.com and locally in the Well-Read Moose.