Today's ghastly groaner

The attorney tells the accused, “I have some good news and some bad news.”

“What’s the bad news?” asks the accused.

“The bad news is, your blood is all over the crime scene, and the DNA tests prove you did it.”

“What’s the good news?”

“Your cholesterol is 130.”

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Send your groaners to Maureen Dolan, mdolan@cdapress.com. Remember: Keep ’em clean and don’t be mean.