Chat: Better late than never

G’morning, of course it’s Chat Day here because obviously it’s …

Thursday?

Yes, I know it’s a little confusing.

The week between Christmas and New Year’s is a bit of a blur for us journalists, too.

But like the U.S. Postal Service — or was it the Pony Express? — we never, ever miss our appointed rounds.

I’ll tell you what, it was no picnic getting Celine Dion to change her plans just for our humble Brand New Day column, either.

Celine has a soft spot for us, though, because of the lovely French words “Coeur d’Alene.”

Celine, you probably know, grew up in Charlemagne, Quebec, and didn’t sing publicly in English until she was well into her 20s — and already an international star.

You probably felt embarrassed that you screwed up that Berlitz course before your trip to Europe — so just to make you feel worse, Celine not only mastered English but has spoken and/or sung fluently in Spanish, Italian, German, Latin, Japanese, and Mandarin Chinese.

With her firm grip of so many languages, but particularly French-Canadian, we asked her for the absolutely accurate definition of Coeur d’Alene.

“Up in the very northern parts of Quebec,” she said, “I believe it translates to ‘heartburn.’”

See why we love her?

Moving along …

ITEM: Hate to start with such a sad tale, but do you remember Chris Lancaster?

He’s the young man who drove a car off the Honeysuckle boat launch last January.

Chris died and a female passenger in the car barely survived by clinging to the dock.

Authorities took a good, long look at the spot after the incident, and the city of Hayden — which is responsible for that launch area — concluded that there were adequate safeguards in place.

Chris Lancaster’s dad, Mike, still believes that safety in the area could be enhanced to prevent another tragedy.

“I am more sure than ever that placing an automatically lifting gate to the boat launch would be a good thing,” Mike said.

“Such a small inconvenience to those accessing that area would be a very small price to prevent the pain that has been, and will continue to be, a part of my life.”

The family will host a memorial at the Honeysuckle launch at 4 p.m. on Jan. 13.

For what it’s worth, I drove the roads up to that launch in daylight and darkness — at various speeds — just after the tragedy, and while Chris Lancaster’s death was an awful outcome, I doubt that anything short of a concrete barrier could have prevented it.

Nevertheless, Mike Lancaster has mentioned that folks are welcome at the memorial whether they feel a gate should be added or not.

That might be a good time for all of us to remember, no matter our age or the location, driving under the influence is a terrible idea.

Boat launch or not, it’s a recipe for heartbreak.

ITEM: This one might not keep you up all night as you turn pages frantically, but we have a book suggestion for you.

It would make an especially good late gift for anyone who lives in the 85838 area code.

Oh, me?

Yes, I do.

More importantly, the author is Ellen Larsen — local historian, all-around fascinating soul — and her book is called: “Rathdrum Idaho: A County Seat That Became a Town.”

Ellen has a trove of stories about this area, and Idaho in general (though we’re naturally partial to the Rathdrum tales).

She can recount all sorts of shenanigans that went on right before and after Idaho became a state.

It was July 3, 1890, but of course you knew that.

However …

Were you also aware that Boise became the capital because all the “state’s” official documents were pilfered from Lewiston and spirited off to the Treasure Valley?

Just ask Ellen.

ITEM: And finally …

I’m mentioning this last item because, well, it’s funny. But also, none of us wants this nutcase crashing through the roof.

Here’s the story, courtesy of Live Science (yes, I now check this stuff because of my pal Haylie Thompson). It involves proving the Earth is flat.

Or maybe not.

A flat-Earth conspiracy theorist named Mike Hughes finally lifted off our spherical planet’s surface into the skies aboard a self-made, steam-powered rocket back on March 24.

Hughes is convinced all the science concerning the planet’s shape is nonsense, and he’s trying to prove it by getting a photo.

He managed to launch himself upward of 1,800 feet and come home with just a “sore back,” but Hughes says he’ll prove his point when he fires himself about seven miles into the atmosphere.

Any pilot could tell him that’s roughly the height where you can actually see the Earth’s curvature.

But never mind.

We’re nearing the big launch for a guy accurately known as “Mad Mike.”

He’s going to ka-boom himself upward from a base in California (where else?) and since no one has any idea what the hell could happen then …

You know, it would be just like a flat-Earth fruitcake from California to fall out of the sky and hit some poor Idaho motorist.

If Hughes does land here, he’ll probably just buy a house and settle down.

•••

Steve Cameron is a columnist for The Press.

A Brand New Day appears from Wednesday through Saturday each week.

Steve’s “Zags Tracker” column on Gonzaga basketball runs on Tuesday.

Email: scameron@cdapress.com

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Twitter: @BrandNewDayCDA