When Crash Davis took one for the team
If you’ve never seen the movie classic “Bull Durham,” well, there’s not much I can do for you.
Suggest you find it as soon as possible, maybe? And then regret all those years you missed?
On the other hand, if you’re one of the millions who have watched “Bull Durham” – maybe dozens of times – you’re grinning already, right?
In case you’ve forgotten the scene exactly, Durham’s Single-A ball club was on one of those never-ending bus rides that minor leaguers must endure.
Kevin Costner’s character, career bush league catcher Crash Davis, is lecturing the team’s only real prospect, flame-throwing pitcher Ebby Calvin “Nuke” LaLoosh (Tim Robbins), on dealing with the media once Nuke reaches the majors.
Crash explains: “Cliches are your friends,” and insists that Nuke write down three crucial phrases:
“We gotta play ‘em one day at a time.”
Check.
“I’m just happy to be here. Hope I can help the ball club.”
Check.
“I just wanna give it my best shot and, the good Lord willing, things will work out.”
Check.
AS IT happened, Oakland A’s fans got something like movie déjà vu to enjoy in 2015.
Perhaps you’ve heard the name of outfielder Mark Canha over the past week or so.
Canha hit a crucial three-run homer to give the A’s breathing room in one victory, and then came right back with a walk-off bomb two nights later.
The guy is a bona fide talent, but he’s been injured for huge chunks of the past two years.
This season, the A’s let him find his stroke at Triple-A Nashville (5 homers in 19 games) and then brought that lively bat to Oakland.
If he can stay healthy, Canha has a huge future – and I’m not saying that just because we went to the same high school.
Plenty of scouts agree, thank you very much.
Anyhow, when Canha made his rookie debut two years ago, he promptly whacked out three hits in his first five at-bats.
Naturally, the kid was summoned to appear on the A’s post-game show.
Completely straight faced, Canha seemed not to hear the first question put to him and said: “I’m just trying to help the ball club and give it my best shot. Good Lord willing ... things will work out.”
Yes, he’d managed to combine a pair of “Bull Durham” clichés into his first two sentences.
SO THE youngster really couldn’t come up with anything to say?
Was he hit with stage fright?
Um, not really.
See, reporter Jane Lee caught up with Canha before his second start, and began to explain that he had accidentally, you know...well, he...
Canha began laughing.
“I’ve been waiting to pull that one out,” Canha said. “I just think there’s some good advice in that movie, so I went ahead and took old Crash’s advice.”
What’s even more amazing about Canha falling head-over-heels for those clichés was the issue of age.
It turns out “Bull Durham” was released in 1988 – a year before Canha was born.
These days, when you see Canha’s name in a box score, allow yourself a little smile. He’s a classic already.
But truth be told, those clichés weren’t even the best lines in the movie. The most memorable was Costner’s partially X-rated monologue. Not fit for your family newspaper, unfortunately.
Therefore, we’ll leave you – appropriately enough — with the last lines of “Bull Durham.”
It’s September, the Bulls’ season is over, and Nuke is miles away, spouting cliches as a major league rookie.
Crash and Annie Savoy (Susan Sarandon), the baseball-as-religion heroine, at last have made it to Annie’s house for the start of what we know will be their life together.
All you see is the exterior of the charming Southern home as you hear Annie’s voice:
“Walt Whitman once said, ‘I see great things in baseball. It’s our game, the American game. It will repair our losses and be a blessing to us.’
“You could look it up.”
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Steve Cameron is a special assignment reporter for The Press. He has scribbled down thousands of clichés during more than three decades covering major league baseball. Reach Steve: scameron@cdapress.com.