Preseason remains a costly nightmare
There are some awful rip-offs in the sports world.
But nothing – nothing – compares to NFL teams trousering tons of money from people allowed to watch a glorified practice.
Exhibition games are nothing more than legalized extortion.
You want to be a Seahawks season ticket-holder?
Fine.
Then be prepared to hand over a wad of cash for two home games featuring athletes who will be selling insurance a few weeks from now.
These meaningless games are noteworthy for two, only two, possible reasons.
First, the money the Seahawks bank gleefully.
Second, assuming you weren’t silly enough to attend one of these exhibitions or watch the nonsense on TV, the only possible news you could be waiting on is whether or not anyone got hurt.
There’s a reason first-team players are on the sidelines talking about mortgage rates and celebrity golf tournaments by the second quarter.
YOU’D HAVE to guess Seattle guru Pete Carroll has bitten through his desk and some of his body parts by now.
For reasons I can’t possibly fathom, Pete left his No. 1 offensive unit on the field throughout the entire first half against Minnesota Saturday night.
Did he think Russell Wilson had forgotten how to take a snap?
And sure enough, when you tempt fate...
With a bit over eight minutes left in the second quarter, left tackle George Fant suffered a torn ACL when center Justin Britt accidentally rolled into his knee.
Fant will miss the entire 2017 season.
“It’s heartbreaking,” Carroll said. “I feel terrible for George.”
Pete also feels pretty damn terrible about leaving his offensive line — the team’s only real question mark — in an ungodly mess.
Just a week or so ago, line coach Tom Cable called the left side of the O-line absolutely stable — meaning there’s still work to do on the right side.
Well, now with Fant gone, right guard Luke Joeckel probably will have to play left tackle.
Who might fill those empty positions on the right side is a total mystery.
Stay loose, Russell.
SO NOW...
Do you really want to plan next weekend around the Seahawks’ exhibition waltz with the Kansas City Chiefs?
Fine.
Even though every game is listed as a sellout, various ticket brokers ALWAYS have some crap seats available — and in fact, you can go online and buy a couple tickets in the nosebleed section for a song.
Ok, it’s a pricey song.
According to the Vivid Seats web site, you can grab two for the Chiefs sleepwalk for the low, low price of $50 apiece — parking and a few cold ones not included.
Of course, those seats are in the Space Needle.
However...
Vivid Seats still has some tickets in inventory for $638 apiece, a pittance if your passion is being close enough to watch third-string quarterbacks trying to remember which direction a play is being run.
And you can bet any amount — say, $638 — that after Fant’s injury last weekend, none of the key Seahawks will be near enough to the action to be grazed by a shanked punt.
What’s left of the starting offensive line is probably in an undisclosed location under armed guard.
Exhibition games are a fraud, pure and simple.
What they prove is that the NFL is so powerful that it has made stealing legal.
Oh, and that key players should never, ever be on the field for more than about a dozen exhibition snaps.
Ask Pete Carroll.
Carefully.
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Steve Cameron is a special assignment reporter for The Press. Reach Steve: scameron@cdapress.com.