Stepping up for civility

Civility starts with each of us. What are you doing to encourage respectful interactions with your fellow man? What do you do when someone is uncivil toward you? Do you match their nasty tone and then raise them one, taking the conversation from warm to boiling, from yellow light to flashing red?

While we all know this is essentially the way of the world, thanks to a whole host of excuses, we also should admit we have the power to change. That power resides in each of us. We’ve done it before, so why not do it again?

We’re reminded of partisan lunch gatherings in a major U.S. city several years ago, where hundreds of party faithful would unite for an hour of good food and fellowship. Each session had a featured speaker, and frequently that speaker was from the other major party.

There were no catcalls, no interruptions, no early departures. There were handshakes, friendly joking, offers to buy the next round. The club benefited. The attendees benefited. The city benefited.

When you respect the other person, be it face to face or computer to computer, civility comes naturally. For respect to exist, each of us needs to be cognizant of the fact that we don’t know everything and that some of what we’re certain we know is wrong. Respectfully listening to other viewpoints can only help us grow, be more productive, become better neighbors and citizens. And yes, when respect goes both ways, maybe we can persuade others toward our way of thinking.

Tomorrow from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. at the Schuler Performing Arts Center in Boswell Hall, “Returning Civility to America’s Democracy: The Promotion of Civil Dialogue” will take place. Among keynotes and panel discussions, a superb mix of Republican and Democratic leaders will be joined by members of various faiths for 10-minute presentations. We believe that by the end of the day, those attending will be more than enlightened; they’ll be ready to act.

One of the places where incivility flourishes is the comment sections of newspaper websites like our own. For years cdapress.com has allowed people to sign up and post strong opinions anonymously. We had convinced ourselves that occasional ego-bashing and name-calling is a small price to pay for freedom of speech. But a harsher truth has emerged as incivility runs broader and deeper all the time, and the need for change becomes increasingly apparent. That’s why a new policy for online comments at cdapress.com is coming soon.