MLP: Me, but not myself

Hats off to Mr. Realtor Person, who (himself!) correctly noted poor reflexive grammar in the following printed quote:

“… led by myself and Jane Doe.”

No, no, no. Led by “me” or led by Doe, or led by Jane Doe and me. Your Mrs. Language Person has said this before, so heed, Dear Reader, lest she become even more the bore.

Reflexive pronouns — himself, herself, myself, itself, themselves, yourself — reflect back. They can never serve as the subject of the sentence (regardless of order). So if one uses an objective pronoun merely to identify — such as who will lead in the example above — “me” (him, her, them) will do.

Consider too, that “led by..” can be reversed — another hint that a reflexive pronoun is incorrect. It can be led by Jane, and Jane can lead. It can be led by me, or I can lead it. But myself cannot lead.

“Please call me or Mr. Realtor Person to learn more.”

“Please call myself or Mr. Realtor Person (‘s self) to learn more.”

Which is correct? Begin with separation, and remember the understood “you” addressed in that sentence. Would you “call me?” Yes. Would you “call Mr. R. P.?” Of course, if he’s in a good mood. Would you call himself? Of course not; how could “you” call “himself?” As silly as it sounds, why then would “you” calling “myself” make sense?

(Beloved Irish Reader Persons, calm yourselves, please. Your MLP is perfectly aware that on that lovely green isle, you may indeed call himself, and I, yourself. Exception noted; but when in Rome…)

So when is “myself” correct? Reflexive pronouns by definition require the person or thing acting, and the person or thing acted upon, to be the same. Hence the use of “self” to make that clear.

“I saw myself in the mirror.”

“Mr. Realtor Person dragged himself to work.”

Whom did I see in the mirror — you, leader Jane, or the cat? No. I saw myself, reflected back. The “self” pronouns are thus reflexive. Whom did Mr. Realtor Person drag to work — his boss? His son? No; he dragged himself, poor sod. The reflexive pronoun identifies the subject (Mr. R. P.) and object (himself) as one and the same (yes, one is the same, so that’s redundant).

Speaking of redundancies, one must in good conscience mention that while not ideal, reflexive pronouns may be used for emphasis. While Mrs. Language Person, so firmly committed to her Snitty-Old-Bittyness, frowns upon the practice, it is accepted as grammatically correct by the Grammar Gods. She herself finds it annoying, despite this fact (does that not sound awful, she asks?).

Yet when used merely for emphasis, rather than identity, reflexive pronouns are known by another name: intensive pronouns.

“Oxford Dictionaries themselves allow the use of intensive pronouns for emphasis, so the use must be correct.”

That’s enough reflection on reflexives for today. Blame Mr. Realtor Person.

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Mrs. Language Person and Sholeh Patrick are columnists for the Hagadone News Network who are increasingly doubtful of their own sense. Contact them at Sholeh@cdapress.com.