Save just one

Every 12 minutes - that's how often someone in the U.S. dies in such despair as to create his own exit. We all hurt deeply from time to time; this is part of life. But sometimes for a variety of reasons, those moments can feel so overwhelming, so unbearable as to leave a person looking for a way out. Sometimes they try to take it. If we're lucky, they gave some hint to someone aware enough to convince them nothing in life is so permanent - life's very definition means change will come, hope is there. They are not alone.

This is not a top 10 list anyone wants to be on, yet at seventh place, Idaho continues to rank among the highest in the nation for its suicide rate - and 47 percent above the national average. Last year, the number of suicides went up slightly; 320 Idahoans completed suicide (78 percent were men and 60 percent involved a firearm), and many more attempted. At 20 suicides per 100,000 population (based on a five-year average), Kootenai County has a higher rate than Idaho's average of 18.8; the highest rate of 39.6 is in Shoshone County.

Not convinced the problem requires your attention? Kids may be more compelling.

According to vital statistics data collected by SPAN Idaho (Suicide Prevention Action Network), nearly one-third of Idaho high school students report feeling very sad or suicidal; 1 in 7 Idaho high school students reported seriously considering it, and half of those tried at least once. The true figure, as not all would admit it, is believed higher. Suicide is the second leading cause of death (behind accidents) for Idahoans under 35, for high school and college students, and for males 10 to 14. More than 20 percent of Idaho children who die this way are under 14.

For perspective consider something everyone can relate to - cars. According to an 11-year study released in May 2013 by the Centers for Disease Control, more adults die by suicide than in car accidents. The biggest surge? Baby Boomers.

Think you're immune? We weren't. Many more families than you may think, perhaps silent but from all walks of life both loving and abusive, rich and poor, close and estranged, struggling and successful, blue collar and professional, are touched by this. While common triggers include major life changes (e.g., death, divorce, job loss), no one profile - either of family or individual - rules out or defines it.

So other than taking threats of self-harm and depressed comments seriously, what can one do? Never allow such a person to be alone in that despairing moment (suicides are rarely attempted with someone else present), and QPR - question, persuade, refer. Question the person about suicidal thoughts and feelings. Persuade them to accept help - from you in this moment by listening carefully without judgment or cliches, and from others with your assistance. Then refer to a professional, with assistance (and follow-up) perhaps in making the call or driving to the appointment, so it actually gets done, and they don't feel alone.

At minimum, please spread word of the suicide hotline (800) 273-TALK; you never know when it may be needed or by whom. Help is out there not only for those who consider it, but for families surviving it. Beyond spreading community awareness and providing prevention training for individuals, law enforcement, emergency and health professionals, the nonprofit SPAN also provides support groups and other assistance.

We can also walk - "walk to remember one lost, and to save one still with us" - at SPAN North Idaho's seventh Annual Memorial Walk. The walk takes place this Sunday, Sept. 13, at 10 a.m. (check in at 9 a.m.) at O'Shay's Restaurant, 313 E. Coeur d'Alene Lake Drive. A lovely way to begin a day with a 3.8 mile walk on the Centennial Trail beside beautiful Lake Coeur d'Alene. For more information or to register, call Catherine Perusse at (208) 290-6161 or see Spanidaho.org.

September is Suicide Prevention Month.

Save one.

Sholeh Patrick is a columnist for the Hagdone News Network. Contact her at Sholeh@cdapress.com.