'I was this close to being another candle blown out'

COEUR d'ALENE — More than 60 people turned out Friday night for the Transgender Day of Remembrance candlelight vigil at the Human Rights Education Institute in downtown Coeur d'Alene.

The vigil was one of many across the country which occur annually on Nov. 20 to memorialize those who have been murdered due to anti-transgender hatred or prejudice. This was the third year a vigil was held at the institute.

Coeur d'Alene Mayor Steve Widmyer read a city proclamation that echoed the city's anti-discrimination ordinance.

The proclamation document said "all persons, regardless of sexual orientation and/or gender identity/expression shall enjoy the full benefits of citizenship in the city of Coeur d'Alene and are afforded equal opportunities for employment, housing, commercial property, and the use of public accommodations."

Speaking at the vigil, Widmyer said the city won't tolerate any type of discrimination.

The vote to approve the anti-discrimination ordinance in June 2013 was 5-1, he said.

Not naming any names, Widmyer referenced the recent city elections in which Dan English beat incumbent Councilman Steve Adams. Any such vote now would be 6-0, the mayor said.

"So we continue to make progress in the city of Coeur d'Alene," Widmyer said. "We, again, are a city that will not tolerate discrimination of any of our citizens."

City Councilman Dan Gookin, who voted for the ordinance, attended the vigil.

"It's good to see something like this happening in Coeur d'Alene," Gookin said. "It's not something someone would expect."

Vigil organizer Juli Stratton, board president for PFLAG (Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) Coeur d'Alene, said it's important to have an event that creates awareness about gender-based violence.

"Sometimes it's not safe for transgender people," Stratton said.

The Human Rights Campaign announced recently that there have been more transgender homicide victims in 2015 in the U.S. than in any other year advocates have recorded. At least 21 people have lost their lives to violence in the first 10 months of this year, according to the civil rights organization working for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people.

During the vigil, volunteers came up front and read short biographies of transgender murder victims. There was a candle for each victim, and the candles were blown out, representing the deaths.

Members of the area's transgender community shared their experiences.

Jenny Seibert, a Spokane transgender activist, told the story of being born male and wanting to become female and a family that resisted the transition. Seibert, who today has six children, lived in Kootenai County from 1992 to 2014.

"(Growing up) I had thought there was something wrong with me, something happened to me that broke me and I needed to be fixed," Seibert said. "Every study that they've done over the last four decades has shown that we're born this way. Not only that, we're not broken and we don't need to be fixed."

Cris Hylton, a 21-year-old Post Falls resident who graduated from North Idaho College last spring, shared experiences of being bullied in high school. Hylton is gender fluid — meaning sometimes male, sometimes female, and sometimes something in between.

Hylton said fellow high school students harassed her, including describing in graphic detail how they would like to kill her. The harassment didn't stop so she left high school early to go to college.

Seeing the names and faces of the murder victims during the vigil, Hylton said she could have easily been one of them.

"I was this close to being another candle blown out," Hylton said.