The Mega, Super Home Video Roundup
Some decent movies are finally trickling into theaters this week, including the well-reviewed "End of Watch" and "The Master." It's been Slim Pickens for a while - and the home video market hasn't been much better.
Never one to steer away from mediocre offerings, here's a swift rundown of what's good and what's terrible at your local video store/box.
"Snow White and the Huntsman" vs. "Mirror Mirror"
Two live-action Snow White films in the span of a few months? Sure! "Mirror Mirror" is the more light-hearted, kid-friendly of the two, with Julia Roberts hamming it up as the evil queen. It's light-hearted, dopey and, at least, visually arresting (courtesy of "The Cell" and "The Fall" director Tarsem Singh).
Going off just previews, I would have bet on "Snow White and the Huntsman" being the better movie. Loaded with fantastical action scenes and a more charismatic cast (Charlize Theron, Chris Hemsworth and a slew of respectable British thespians playing dwarves), "The Huntsman" unfortunately never musters an engaging story, and Kristen Stewart is (big shocker) a total bore in the lead.
Mirror Mirror: B-
Snow White and the Huntsman: C+
Battleship
This movie is hilarious for so many reasons. And honestly, what would you expect from a movie based on a board game?
It would be cruel to spoil the various absurdities, especially in the film's final act... but keep a look out for a surprising crew of last minute heroes that help save the day.
Grade: C
The Five-Year Engagement
An enjoyable and occasionally very funny comedy from "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" collaborators Jason Segel (star/co-writer) and Nicholas Stoller (director/co-writer). Sadly, the film runs more than two hours and often feels like you're watching the entire engagement in real time.
Grade: B-
The Pirates! Band of Misfits
Clever Claymation comedy from Aardman, the creators of "Wallace & Gromit," features Hugh Grant in his funniest performance in years, voicing the deluded and ambitious Pirate Captain.
Grade: B+
Margaret
The long-delayed and heavily anticipated drama from Kenneth Lonergan ("You Can Count on Me") about a young woman (Anna Paquin) who witnesses a horrific bus accident is lengthy, provocative and packed with stars in supporting roles (Matt Damon, Mark Ruffalo, etc.). It's also occasionally ponderous and incomplete, even at 2 and a half hours long.
Grade: B-
Let's speed this up, shall we?
The Lorax
Agreeable kids fare with a few snappy tunes. Grade: B
Think Like a Man
Kevin Hart deserves a better comedy vehicle. Grade: C
Lockout
Cheap, dull space adventure. Grade: C
The Three Stooges
Perfectly fine for fans of the old movies... and 5-year-olds. Grade: C+
Salmon Fishing in the Yemen
Way, way more enjoyable than the title suggests. Grade: B+
The Raid: Redemption
Uber-violent but compelling action import. Grade: B
The Cabin in the Woods
See it now. Don't read anything about it. Grade: A
Ticket Stubs is sponsored by the Hayden Cinema Six Theater. Showtimes at www.HaydenCinema6.com. Tyler Wilson can be reached at twilson@cdapress.com.