Enemies domestic

We are all soldiers in a battle against an enemy many of us choose not to see. Domestic violence is prevalent, pervasive and destructive. What's more, each of us has a role in preventing and stopping it.

The effect of domestic violence is profound on many levels. Close to home, domestic violence leaves a trail of ruin. Even a single slap can be heard and will be felt for generations. It will grow. It will multiply. It will fester. And the pain it will cause will intensify with time into an insatiable storm of destruction.

As I sit in the Kootenai County courthouse, I hear tale after tale that chills me to the bone. Some of the big stories make the newspaper ... like the man who shot his girlfriend in October before turning the gun on himself. But many do not. The terror that our neighbors live in is real. The confusion, pain and rage are tangible day in and day out in a court system, but the impact goes far beyond that.

Domestic violence harms collateral victims, hurts our economy and weakens our society. According to the Idaho Coalition Against Sexual and Domestic Violence, more than 16,000 children alone are suffering the consequences of witnessing domestic violence. Kids who see these things suffer from depression, anxiety, confusion, low self-esteem, anger, aggression, guilt, withdrawal, self-destructiveness and a host of other physical ailments. In other words, exposure not only ensures that this caustic cycle will continue generation to generation, but the cost to society of dealing with the mental and physical health aftermath is extensive.

The CDC's most recent estimates are that domestic violence exceeded $8.3 billion in 2003. However, this number does not include costs for child abuse nor costs associated with the criminal justice system. The majority of that estimate is attributable to direct costs of medical and mental health care. The indirect costs of lost productivity are staggering as well. Victims of severe intimate partner violence lose nearly 8 million days of paid work. That is the equivalent of more than 32,000 full-time jobs, and almost 5.6 million days of household productivity each year.

Besides the destruction that domestic violence wreaks on society in terms of monetary cost and health issues, many pay the ultimate price. In 2007, intimate partners committed 14 percent of all homicides in the U.S.

Once again, I am using my column as a call to action. I am asking you to find motivation to accept your role in the fight against domestic violence. For those of you that aren't, put yourselves momentarily in the shoes of a victim. Feel the helplessness of knowing that reason and logic have evaporated into a blind rage that empowers your attacker to justify anything.

The cycle needs to be broken, and the battle is essential, but the attack plan, like many of the crucial battles of our generation, is complicated. This battle cannot be fought in a John Wayne-style battle royale. You must be armed with information, compassion and a phone list. You aren't going to be anyone's hero, but you can help empower someone to be his or her own hero.

If you witness an act of domestic violence, call 911 immediately. If you suspect that someone is a victim, there are resources available through nonprofits and local agencies. These resources will help arm you to do your part as friend. They will also provide support for victims. The Idaho Coalition against Domestic Sexual & Domestic Violence can be reached toll free at (888) 293-6118 or online at www.idvsa.org. The North Idaho Violence Prevention Center crisis line is (208) 664-1443, and their website is http://www.cdawomenscenter.org.

Luke Malek is a home-grown Kootenai County boy currently in a voluntary exile in pursuit of a law degree that he hopes will empower him to battle objectionable compliance with the status quo.