THE CHEAP SEATS with STEVE CAMERON: Cal is worth watching ... Julio, not so much

The Mariners are tumbling toward obscurity in the AL West. 

That ugly three-game sweep at the hands of Baltimore, wrapped up with an unsightly 4-3 defeat on Thursday, left the M’s spitting out the ashes of a 3-6 homestand. 

They just aren’t a very good baseball team right now. 

It’s tough to watch.  

I’m tempted to find some other evening entertainment as we head toward summer. 

Only Cal Raleigh, and his personal assault on the heroics of Barry Bonds, would make you want to spend a few hours suffering with the Mariners. 

Cal hit a two-run homer (his 24th to lead all of MLB) and singled in a run with a beautiful piece of two-strike hitting on Thursday. 

You don’t have to be Einstein to do the math on the Big Dumper’s afternoon. 

Yep, he accounted for all three runs. 

If Cal might keep me interested for a while, though, his pal in center field makes me want to be picking sunflowers. 

Or practicing the cello. 

Julio Rodriguez is playing blockheaded baseball, and it’s damn hard to watch. 

I’VE NOW given up on the idea that Julio might have a truly productive at-bat when it really matters. 

He has only one approach at the plate, and every pitcher knows it now. 

It’s the same dreary at-bat for Julio. 

Fastballs in tight off the plate (he swings for a useless strike) and breaking stuff WAY outside (swings wildly to finish a strikeout). 

Only three or four Mariners are really acceptable big-league hitters, and guys like J.P. Crawford have learned the middle-of-the-field approach taught by Edgar Martinez and new batting coach Kevin Seitzer. 

Everyone else is trying, at least. 

Julio? 

Nah. 

Swing at the same pitches, with the same ferocity. 

Get nothing. 

Julio has reached a spot where his base hits are singles, rolling through the left side of the infield, or slow grounders that he can beat out. 

The guy can still run. 

Thursday’s loss was a classic, assuming Julio is starting to drive you bonkers. 

He struck out three times, leaving runners stranded twice, and came up with a man on third and one out. 

Infield playing in. 

A player with Julio’s skills (and salary) should be able to manipulate the bat in situations like that, and somehow get the run home. 

That’s what stars do. 

But, no. 

He got jammed (of course he did) and hit a weak one-hopper to short, leaving Crawford stuck at third. 

Fortunately, in that case at least, Raleigh came up behind Julio and demonstrated the art of scoring a critical run — reaching out and down for an off-speed pitch, and serving it into left field. 

At the end of the day, the Orioles struck with a couple of sudden homers off Bryan Woo in the sixth and made their 4-3 lead stand up. 

The Mariners didn’t even threaten in the final three innings, and Julio’s chance in the eighth produced a called strike three. 

Right down the middle. 

HEY, IT would be great if Julio “found it” sometime soon. 

Like, before the Mariners are buried for good. 

He’s had incredible hot streaks, which scouts and baseball execs claim are the product of an almost unnatural ability to hit ANY pitch when he’s on a roll. 

I’ve had personnel people tell me that Julio is a bit like Vlad Guererro Sr., who once hit a pitch that bounced in the dirt. 

Lined it for a double. 

In other words, we’re wasting our time hoping that Julio will change his approach with two strikes, or with the tying run on third. 

That’s just not him. 

The trade-off, I suppose, is that you have to suffer and feel sick when you endure these one-run losses — then have fun when Julio hits .488 in August. 

Or something like that. 

Man, it’s hard work. 

The Baltimore pitchers have been terrible all year, and they shouldn’t be able to shackle Julio, but when he’s in this sort of funk, he actually gets himself out. 

We have to HOPE he eventually gets hot. 

I worry that it’s not exactly a given. 

Julio’s exit velocity, barrel rate and hard-hit rate have gone down each of the last three years — season to season. 

Now, he’s hitting .187 with runners in scoring position and pitchers have figured him out.

Go light some candles. 

Soon. 

Email: scameron@cdapress.com 

Steve Cameron’s “Cheap Seats” columns appear in The Press three times each week, normally Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday unless, you know, stuff happens. 

Steve suggests you take his opinions in the spirit of a Jimmy Buffett song: “Breathe In, Breathe Out, Move On.”