Where hearts heal and friends are made

HAYDEN — A bereft widow can only clean an empty house so much before the solitude takes its toll.

PK Kiely arrived in Coeur d'Alene with her husband seven years ago on May 5.

"May 7, my husband passed away," Kiely, 91, said Thursday.

After weeks of grieving and handling the many dejecting tasks that accompany the death of a spouse, Kiely, then 84, found herself alone in a new, unknown place.

"I was lost, I really was, without my husband," she said. "He was wonderful."

She said they planned to start a new chapter in Coeur d'Alene.

"I never expected to wake up in the morning and he be gone," she said.

She said she stood in her kitchen one morning thinking, "How much more can I dust? How much more can I sweep? How much more can I garden?" when she decided to go for a drive.

"I didn't know where I was going, because I was new to Coeur d'Alene," she said.

She drove north on Government Way into Hayden. She was stopped in traffic as a truck backed out of a little strip mall. As the truck moved, she saw the sign for the Hayden Senior Center.

She thought to herself, "Why not?"  

Kiely went in, and she has been a staple at the center ever since.

"To volunteer, it filled my days," she said. "I kind of run the pinochle group. Thursdays, I never miss bingo. Everybody is wonderful."

She said the Hayden Senior Center benefits not just those who have lost spouses, but any senior who walks through its doors, whether they are volunteering or simply hanging out.

"We're one on one with each other," Kiely said. "You don't walk in and nobody knows you."

That camaraderie is encouraging for seniors who frequent the center.

"They really need it," Kiely said. "There's nothing worse than being alone in your life. Nothing worse. Trust me, I've been through a lot of things. That's the worst thing that can happen to you."

The Hayden Senior Center operates out of the Coeur d'Alene Shrine Club Event Center at 1250 W. Lancaster Road. It moved into the shared location after being priced out of its previous Government Way location, where it had served seniors for 26 years.

Many of those who visit the center come from municipalities other than Hayden.

"We've been coming here for seven years," said Judie LaMotte of Coeur d'Alene.

LaMotte enjoyed Thursday's popular meat loaf lunch with good friend Carol Clemons of Coeur d'Alene. Yuki Sacra of Coeur d'Alene and friend John Nicklas of Fernan, seated at the neighboring table, come to the center at least once a week.

"The food is wonderful," Sacra said.

Officials of the nonprofit senior center hope to again someday have a home all their own, but in the meantime are working on an awareness campaign to generate support for an eventual capital campaign. Board members are busy making connections in the community and working to network with local chambers, businesses and more.

"We would love to have our own building," said Lisa Martin, center director. "But the very first thing is, we're just trying to get out there and have the community know who we are. Without that piece, we can't go any further."

The center offers a variety of programs for health and wellness, nutrition, socialization and cognitive health. Visit haydenseniorcenter.org for details.

"Our board is always looking for new ways to help develop more ways to engage seniors in our community," board member Diane Zell said. "So many people ask about how they can get their home-bound parent to feel that sense of community again.

"We have found that once someone comes to participate either by enjoying a meal or coming to one of our many activities, they want to come back," she said. "Everyone is so friendly."

The Hayden Senior Center will host a Miles for Smiles Classic Car Cruise and Car Show benefit event at the center Sept. 7. Cars 1999 and older will participate in the free cruise, which starts at 1 p.m. and will cruise by elder care facilities in Coeur d'Alene. The car show will be at 2 p.m. The event will also feature a people's choice award, silent auctions and prizes.

    From left, friends Linda Aubert, Yuki Sacra and John Nicklas smile for the camera before lunch Thursday at the Hayden Senior Center.
  

    Hayden Senior Center board member Diane Zell and her sweet 1974 Chevy Corvette Stingray are seen Thursday at the center. The Miles for Smiles Classic Car Cruise and Car Show to benefit the center will be Saturday, Sept. 7.