THE CHEAP SEATS with STEVE CAMERON: Like it or not, the U.S. plays on

If you’re a soccer fan, your heartbeat is just now returning to normal.

If not, you’re wondering what all the fuss is about.

Sorry, I can’t help you with that — but you’re a distinct outlier among the world’s eight million inhabitants.

And hey …

We’ll get back to football and basketball soon enough, I promise.

Meanwhile, though, everyone else seems to be invested somehow in the World Cup, which has become a cauldron of drama.

Moreover, most in that huge majority care about the fate of the United States, one way or another.

People are either rooting passionately for our underdog team to have some success during this wild tournament in Qatar — or hoping the upstart Americans are once again sent home beaten, just a gang of noisy outsiders trying to crash a sport that isn’t ours to claim.

Maybe they’d even forgotten the U.S. is on a quest to become a major player in world soccer (which, remember, the rest of the globe calls football).

That wouldn’t be a shock, since we didn’t even qualify for the 2018 World Cup, having been knocked out of a regional playoff with a more-than-embarrassing loss to Trinidad and Tobago.

THIS TIME around, however, the youngest American team ever assembled not only went to Qatar intending to play competitively — but to give the world’s recognized powers a bit of a nightmare on the pitch.

The U.S. did that almost immediately (at least to a point) by getting a 1-1 draw with Wales, unfortunately tossing away a win with a silly penalty, and followed that up with a shocking scoreless draw with England.

That one served some notice, because the unfancied Americans — who’d literally been laughed at by the British media — had much the better of the match, and could have won it if Christian Pulisic’s rocket hadn’t caromed off the crossbar.

Or if Weston McKennie’s connection with a cross directly in front of the net had stayed down instead of sailing harmlessly into the crowd.

Those two draws left us with the challenge of winning the third and final group game, or getting on a plane home — and of course, that showdown HAD to be against Iran.

SO MUCH political and sporting history is involved with the two countries, for a start, and just to raise the stakes, Iran needed just a draw against the long-despised Yanks to reach the tournament knockout stage for the very first time.

As if more tension were needed in a match like this, you probably know about all that tension on the streets back in Iran — where millions are protesting against the theocratic government, and facing brutal repression as a consequence.

Even the Iranian players in Qatar could be in trouble for refusing to sing the country’s national anthem before the first game of the Cup.

It may be stretching the point, but anti-government groups in Iran may actually have had mixed feelings about the match result between their own team and players representing the nation known for years now as “The Great Satan.”

And yes …

Naturally, the mullahs who rule Iran have blamed Western countries — and the United States specifically — for the internal uprising in Tehran and throughout the rest of the nation.

How much more tension would you need for a soccer game?

Excuse me, for a football match.

WITH SUCH a backdrop, the World Cup showdown between the U.S. and Iran on Tuesday almost had to be dripping with emotion.

And it was.

You surely know that Pulisic put his side ahead 1-0 in the 38th minute, converting a perfect headed assist from Sergino Dest.

Pulisic, though, wound up injured after crashing into keeper Alireza Beiranvand, and our star could not continue into the second half.

More drama …

The score almost became 2-0 just before halftime, when Timothy Weah’s shot nestled into the far corner of the net — only for Weah to be judged just marginally offside in the buildup.

Thus, that lone goal stood there by itself, throughout a second half that grew more and more frantic by the minute.

Iran began to pour players forward and lump balls into the box.

U.S. coach Gregg Berhalter made a series of changes with nine minutes left on the clock — but it was obvious that time would be closer to double with so much injury to be added.

The switches didn’t exactly produce magic.

SUDDENLY, the U.S. couldn’t keep the ball, and plans for subs Haji Wright and Shaq Moore to produce some action at the Iranian end failed entirely.

Instead, the most exhausted American starters had to dig in and try to protect goalkeeper Matt Turner.

Captain Tyler Adams was immense, and seemed to be everywhere, while Yunus Musah and Antonee Robinson tried to protect the flanks, and center backs Tim Ream and Cameron Carter-Vickers (in his first World Cup appearance) repelled attack after attack.

It was only beautiful soccer if you admire, as Berhalter does, the idea of “suffering” for the cause.

The game never seemed to end, and the Iranians twice screamed for a penalty …

But none was given.

Then, finally, it ended with players on both sides collapsing to the grass.

The U.S. is through to the round of 16, and a match against the Netherlands on Saturday.

Pulisic is an injury doubt, and so is striker Josh Sargent.

Still …

They’ve yet to lose a game.

“The world ignored us,” McKennie said afterward, “but we’re still here.”

Yes, and the rest of us can get back to breathing normally for a few days.

Email: scameron@cdapress.com

Steve Cameron’s “Cheap Seats” columns appear in The Press four times each week, normally Tuesday through Friday.

Steve suggests you take his opinions in the spirit of a Jimmy Buffett song: “Breathe In, Breathe Out, Move On.”