SATIRE: To be a patriot

Over the past several years it appears that to be a good Conservative Republican Patriot you must be a good Christian and believe only what is in the Bible. You must also reduce most spending for the common good and increase spending for corporate good.

One simple and correct way to push this truth is to vote against any and all school bond issues until they get rid of all phony science-based classes and liberal current affairs and civics classes. Replace those with Baptist ministers teaching the only truth. And it must be only Baptist because only Baptists can enter Heaven.

This will set our use on the true path to peace and prosperity.

ROBERT GRANGAARD

Hayden