SHERIFF: The good old days

The running for sheriff and apparently some bad blood brewing reminded me of my grandfather, who was sheriff of Woodward, Okla. He was running for re-election in the 1930s and after losing, wrote the following to the local paper. I’m sure that those running locally couldn’t hold a candle to him.

‘SEE YOU IN 34’

Lost four months and 20 days canvassing; lost 25 pounds in weight; lost 1,360 hours of sleep thinking about the election; wore out two sets of tires and a perfectly good automobile; lost 50 acres of corn and a crop of wheat; lost two front teeth and a lot of hair in personal combat with an opponent; donated one beef, four goats and five sheep to barbecues, spent $39.45 at box suppers given at candidates’ expense to aid community enterprises; gave away two pair of suspenders, five house dresses, 10 dolls and 14 baby rattles.

Kissed 126 babies, kindled 14 kitchen fires; took down eight stoves; carried 72 buckets of water; shocked 200 acres of oats; chopped 25 acres of cotton; drove thousands of miles; shook hands 9,999 times; smiled at everybody; cried at least six handkerchiefs wet at every funeral; told 10,001 lies and talked enough to make 100 volumes; attended 26 revival meetings; was baptized four times by immersion, twice sprinkled, and dry cleaned a number of times.

Joined a church in every town; contributed $50 to foreign missions; stirred mash, helped cap “home brew” and contributed to all “bone-dry” organizations; made love to nine grass widows; secretly married four old maids and got dog bit 19 times; wore out three suits of unionall, five straw hats, four pair brogan shoes and six bandanna handkerchiefs campaigning the farmers (then they forgot to go vote).

I was defeated, but not discouraged, as I am a politician and will be a candidate for something or other in 1934, and will be seeing you. — BEN BARNETT

He passed away about 60 years ago, but it shows how much harder it was to win in the 1930s than it is today.

DALE HEDMAN

Hayden