MLP: No, that's not 'epic'
Once upon a time, not so long ago, “epic” was fit only for — need your MLP even say it? — an epic. As in the likes of Homer’s poetry. The Iliad. Odysseus and his tragedian journey, poor soul.
Please, Dear Readers, Mrs. Language Person begs you to take heed:
A sale is not epic. It’s not an epic poker win. Friday’s party wasn’t epic, nor was MLP’s triple shot cappuccino (praise be to that aromatic stimulant).
Please! Cease and desist — this abuse of epic has reached (tongue-in-cheek) epic proportion.
MLP points to that respected arbiter of American English, Merriam-Webster, which defines epic (noun) as “a long narrative poem in elevated style recounting the deeds of a legendary or historical hero;” and (adj.) “of, relating to, or having the characteristics of an epic.”
What does that have to do with 40 percent off?
Epic derives from the Latin “epicus,” and Greek “epikos,” referring to a speech or poem. Its first known use was in the 1500s, but the heroic deeds it was intended to describe aren’t restricted to the ancient. One might say Superman’s story is epic. Perhaps even the movie, “Gladiator.”
But Sunday’s dinner? A fetching haircut? Not epic, absolutely not!
“Epic” has become a catch phrase of the under-30 crowd, misused and abused to describe just about anything from slipper sales to softball wins. Epic is not — your MLP repeats, NOT — synonymous with “massive,” “awesome,” or “amazing.”
MLP fans and critics alike may remember a similarly snide lament against the incorrect usage of the word “random” — a poor substitute for weird or odd. You may recall, Dear Reader, that the definition of random is “lacking a specific pattern or purpose.”
Rather apropos, your MLP would argue, of epic’s epic (shudder) exploitation. Words don’t mean anything anymore, if any misuse is fair game. Evolution, yes. Erosion: No. No!
Your MLP asks in desperation, if everything and anything can be epic, what should we call the great works of Milton?
A Paradise Lost.
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Coming Thursday: An under-30 rebuttal.
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Mrs. Language Person and Sholeh Patrick are columnists for the Hagadone News Network. Comments from fellow word nerds welcome at Sholeh@cdapress.com