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'I had no idea' just won't cut it, guys

| October 14, 2018 1:00 AM

Please do something really important today.

It might save a life you love. It could be one step toward making the world a better place.

Do what one local father did: Email a link to your daughters and your daughters-in-law.

Then do what we hope other fathers also did: Forward the link to your sons and your sons-in-law.

Here it is: https://bit.ly/2A2rL4a

That link will take the recipient to Sholeh Patrick’s Oct. 9 column in The Press. The column illuminated one big difference between men and women: Most men never worry about being sexually assaulted, yet women have no choice but to take serious safety measures on a daily basis.

Quoting the work of Jackson Katz in his 2006 bestseller, “The Macho Paradox,” the column notes some of the precautions women must take:

“Hold my keys as a potential weapon. Look in the back seat of the car before getting in. Carry a cellphone. Don’t go jogging at night. Lock all the windows when I sleep, even on hot summer nights. Be careful not to drink too much. Don’t put my drink down and come back to it; make sure I see it being poured. Own a big dog. Carry Mace or pepper spray. Have an unlisted phone number. Have a man’s voice on my answering machine. Park in well-lit areas. Don’t use parking garages. Don’t get on elevators with only one man, or with a group of men. Vary my route home from work. Watch what I wear. Don’t use highway rest areas. Use a home alarm system. Don’t wear headphones when jogging. Avoid forests or wooded areas, even in the daytime. Don’t take a first-floor apartment. Go out in groups. Own a firearm. Meet men on first dates in public places. Make sure to have a car or cab fare. Don’t make eye contact with men on the street. Make assertive eye contact with men on the street.”

Feedback to the newspaper about that column exceeded the norm by far. Women were echoing the truth of Katz’s words, some of them with bitterness, but others with optimism that a little awareness could go a long way.

What was startling was the number of men saying, in effect, “I had no idea.” “I never thought about it before.”

Please, think about it now. Share this important perspective piece with everybody you think might benefit from improved understanding, greater compassion and constructive action.

Fathers, husbands, brothers, grandpas: One out of three women you know has been or will be sexually assaulted. Real men would not tolerate that for a moment.