Today's ghastly groaner

Tom, Dick and Harry were ironworkers on the 120th floor of the world’s tallest skyscraper. They worked on the same floor and ate lunch together every day.

One day, Tom opened his lunch pail and looked inside.

“Egg salad. I have been eating egg salad every day for the last 25 years. I swear, if I have to look at egg salad one more day, I’m going to jump right off this building.”

“I know what you mean,” Dick said. “It’s tuna for me. Tuna, tuna, tuna. I musta ate every tuna in the sea at least twice. If I gotta face tuna again, I’m jumping.”

Harry picked up his sandwich. “See this? It’s bologna. I’m sick of bologna. I’ll jump with you two if I get bologna tomorrow.”

Come the morrow, all three had the same lunch and all three jumped off the building.

At the group funeral, Tom’s wife was crying her eyes out. “I could have made him anything he wanted! Why didn’t he just say something?”

Dick’s wife was also beside herself. “All it would have taken was one word. He didn’t have to eat tuna every day if he didn’t want it.”

Harry’s wife was shaking her head. “Don’t look at me. He always packed his own lunch.”

— Jim Mowreader

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Send your groaners to Maureen Dolan, mdolan@cdapress.com.

Remember: Keep ’em clean and don’t be mean. Thanks!