Was it really a white Christmas?

Amazing how something so nice and simple can lead you down a rabbit hole.

Go ask Alice.

Right, let’s back up and we’ll explain...

I had back surgery this year. I still have to make trips for physical therapy, and regularly drop in at a local spa for what are called hydro-massages.

So the week before Christmas, I was wandering in to get thump-thump-thumped in this expensive machine when the young woman at the desk — just to make pleasant conversation — shared a wish.

“I don’t care what other kind of weather we get,” Taylor Vaughn said. “I just want it to be a white Christmas, and I’ll be happy.”

Ms. Vaughn’s request was beautifully granted as it did, indeed, snow on Christmas Day.

But wait...

What exactly constitutes the famous “white Christmas”?

Is it as simple as we suspect?

IN A word...

No.

Like everything else involving science, we mortals can (and do) get it wrong pretty frequently.

You would think that if you look outside on Christmas morning and there is some gorgeous, postcard-perfect snow floating down, well...

That’s it.

Cue Bing Crosby: “I’m dreaming of a white Christmas, just like the ones I used to know...”

Ahhhhh, let’s all hug!

That scenario is pretty obvious, like standing for an hour in zero-degree wind chill and having someone ask: “Are you cold?”

Duh!

But see, there are plenty of other options in the weather world, so we did the wise thing and contacted the gentlemen who write about such things for The Press — meteorologist Randy Mann and climatologist Cliff Harris.

To continue with our standing-outside analogy, Randy and Cliff both suggested that in weather terms, yes, you can spend time wearing a golf shirt in the Yukon — and discover that you’re NOT cold.

Remember that was just an analogy, OK?

Don’t try it at home.

The real point here is that there are rules for a white Christmas, just like for everything else on the planet.

FIRST OF all, you don’t need precipitation on the magic day.

“Basically, one inch of snow on the ground makes it ‘technically’ a white Christmas,” Mann said. “So if it’s like this year, when there was more than an inch already and it’s staying really cold, you know ahead of time that it’ll be a white Christmas.”

Oh...

Harris addressed dreamers like Ms. Vaughn, with their first Christmas looks outside.

“Sometimes it can be confusing,” he said. “Say there’s no snow on the ground on Christmas morning, but then it snows more than one inch later in the day, when it’s dark or when people hardly notice.

“That really does make it a white Christmas officially — just not what people were hoping to see.”

As long as we’re wrapped up in science instead of dreams here...

Kootenai County has better than a 50-50 chance of snow on Christmas Day each year.

“I haven’t updated this lately,” Mann said, “but between 1895 and 2006, it snowed on Christmas 78 times in Coeur d’Alene.

“We don’t get a ton of snow here, but that’s more than half the time.”

Which brings up a bigger question...

Would Bing Crosby be satisfied?

Or Taylor Vaughn, for that matter?

•••

Steve Cameron is a columnist for The Press.

Email: [email protected].

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