Pedaling a hot new tourism idea

We’ve seen trees bearing fruit, shoes and underwear. But a bicycle?

Quick, somebody — call the velocipedic arborist!

Disclosure last week that a two-wheeler resides comfortably in a Coeur d’Alene City Park tree some 60 feet above ground was stunning news to thousands of Press readers and, perhaps, to one bicycle owner whose ride had gone missing. But we were disappointed to learn that this far-flung feat has actually been going on annually for more than a decade while city officials never said a word about it. This closely guarded secret hints at a hidden branch of government, but that’s a story for another time.

Now, about that bike.

Its pine-scented aerie is high enough — think halfway up The Coeur d’Alene Resort tower — that even the most conscientious conspiratologist would have a hard time determining how the thing got up there, let alone why. What has city officials on high alert, however, isn’t how the bike ascended; it’s what happens if it descends. Rapidly.

If a penny from a skyscraper really can kill you, imagine a full-sized bike crashing on your cranium from six stories up. Citizens’ health, safety and an aversion to potentially devastating lawsuits motivate municipal officials, so civic leaders are justified in looking out for the well-being of our persons and their purse.

But we also admit to thinking this stunt is pretty cool, pretty creative and pretty harmless because the bike is chained to the tree. It’s not going anywhere unless a big part of the tree does, and in that case, if you’re on the ground looking up when it comes down, the bike on a branch is going to be the least of your concerns.

Rather than pay good money to have the bike brought down, we say, leave it be. It would probably be quickly replaced anyway, but besides, it’s a two-wheeled novelty that could go places.

People pay to see big balls of twine and shrunken heads, so why not charge a buck to cast your eyes on a bike that flies? Heck, why not put bikes of different colors and sizes in all the big City Park trees? Talk about a tourist attraction: Come see the world’s tallest bike park!

When you’ve got that, who needs a silly lake?