It pays to be nice in Nice

Much has been written about the erosion of civility in human interactions. It's hard not to notice (at least for those old enough to remember when things were different) that doors are less often held a moment to prevent hitting the person walking behind, that "hellos" and "how-are-yous" from passersby are less common, and that when you drop something, strangers are less likely to notice, let alone offer help.

It's a far more self-absorbed life.

Now imagine being a waiter in this changed world. When your workday is service-oriented and often rush-rush (further discouraging polite interaction), keeping the chin up can be challenging, wage or no wage. In the U.S. with its "customers are always right" sales culture, we diners feel free to be as rude as we wish. "If I pay for it I can do what I want" is the American way. Not so elsewhere, as an experiment at a popular cafe on the French Riviera called Le Petite Syrah suggested.

Just over a year ago this cafe in Nice turned what began as a joke - to address increasingly surly customers during the lunch rush - into a rather radical shift in the customer-server relationship. The French have always taken etiquette seriously; as in Italy, forget to begin even a short-term encounter (especially with a stranger) with "hello" and you're considered rude. Each culture has such minimums, even if they are receding.

Will servers at Le Petite Syrah serve rude customers? Sure. But the price goes up.

So don't forget your "bonjour" (hello) and "s'il vous plait" (please) and, why not, a "merci" (thank you). A little civility puts cash in your pocket.

According to worldwide news reports when the policy began, a chalkboard menu lays out the rules of social engagement:

The cost of "Un cafe" is 7 euro. "Bonjour, un cafe" runs 4.25. But "Bonjour, un cafe s'il vous plait" will lower the bill to less than 2 euro.

Hello; save at least 75 percent just for using manners we should have learned in kindergarten? Yes, please, and thank you very much.

What if such a policy permeated all public interactions? Frustrated staff did it to be funny one day, but it worked so well management kept it in place. Customers saved money, began to smile more, and seemed more relaxed; mutual experiences improved and humor ensued. Everybody wins (except perhaps the bottom line, but the cafe is still in business as of early April). According to reports some customers joked about it, exaggerating politeness to obsequious reverence.

Manners aren't about formality; they're about consideration. They show respect, indicating we value others as highly as ourselves. It's a shame we more often seem to need incentive to be polite, but whatever it takes, day-to-day life experience would improve for everyone as the people interacting in this little cafe found. And just maybe old human habits would return, bringing civility from exception back to rule.

"We shall never know all the good that a simple smile can do." - Mother Teresa

Sholeh Patrick is a columnist for the Hagadone News Network. Contact her at [email protected].