Naked and, apparently, unashamed

It's really the dirtiest blind date I can think of.

Discovery Channel has fired quite possibly the last salvo in reality television with its recent release of "Naked and Afraid."

The new series brings together two strangers, a man and a woman, strips them down, plunks them in the wilderness with no food or water and expects them to fend for themselves for 21 days.

Apparently the producers didn't think that two nude people together for three weeks was enough of a plot line, so they had to add in the fact that the duo had never met previously.

So not only are you baring your soul (and everything else) to your partner, you're also doing it while trying to survive when you have only one personal item.

For me, I can't decide which would be worse: Being naked for three weeks, or having someone else chuckling at me every time they look at me, for three solid weeks.

So here you are, showing off what God gave you, and taking in what God gave your partner, trying to focus on the task of hunting and gathering for 21 days while attempting to block out the fact that your face and frontal regions are to be in full view of millions of clothed viewers.

I remember watching the first season of "Survivor" and thinking that maybe, just maybe, I would be up to the challenge of trying to outwit and out-alliance my fellow cast members.

While "Survivor" adds more humans to the dynamic, it also added the element of clothes that ensured that modesty remained somewhat intact, all except for first-season winner Richard Hatch, who celebrated his birthday during taping in his birthday suit, much to the consternation of some of his cast members.

I suppose the producers added the "afraid" to the title, since "Naked and confident" or "Naked and proud" just didn't quite capture the essence they were looking for...

The best part of the new show, for me anyway, is the prize for the winners. According to the show's website (www.discovery.com/tv-shows/naked-and-afraid/about-the-show/about-the-show.htm), "the only prize is their sense of accomplishment."

Hmmm... "Survivor" runs a similar challenge, and the winner gets a boatload of money. But when you survive three weeks in the wilderness for this show, you'll receive all the fame your shortcomings and dusty physique can muster.

I don't know what amount of money would make me accept this challenge, but "sense of accomplishment" won't feed the bulldog - or me after three weeks of near-starvation - that's for sure.

So I'm sure you'll want to see how this modern-day Tarzan and Jane drama turns out. They may not be swinging from vines or have chimps for companions, but they'll be letting out primal screams at one point or another, especially when hunger takes hold.

Tune in Sundays on Discovery - if you're not afraid.

Jerry Hitchcock is afraid just getting out of the shower these days. You can attempt to reach him at 664-8176, Ext. 2017, via email at jhitchcock@cdapress.com or follow him on Twitter at HitchTheWriter.