AID: Q&A with the real world

Since we’re not on public assistance, and do not get food stamps, this is how I would answer these questions:

Q: Do you eat meat?

A: Only the cheapest cuts if it’s on sale, and the last day it’s on the shelf.

Q: Do you eat “fresh” fruit and vegetables?

A: What’s an apple?

Q: Do you consume dairy products?

A: Does that include processed cheese and diluted skim milk?

Q: Do you eat seafood?

A: Sure. Do you have any to give me?

Q: Do you eat sweets?

A: Yes. We stock up when they’re offered free. Oh yes, and at Halloween.

Sorry, but that’s the way it is for most of us in the real world.

PAUL UNDERWOOD

St. Maries