Ask your audiologist...

How do you know if someone is selectively listening or not? My elderly mother hears me sometimes, but not other times.

First, I would ask you if your mother has been evaluated for hearing loss. If she has hearing loss, is she wearing properly fit hearing aids? If she is hearing at comfortable levels, there may be some other problems, so keep reading. Most people do not selectively listen on purpose.

Everyone needs to realize that there are three parts to be able to hear and understand well: 1. Hearing. 2. Listening. 3. Understanding. Any one person can have difficulty with one or all of these parts.

So let's start with hearing. Some people don't hear well because they have hearing loss. If someone has hearing loss, they should be fit with hearing aids so they have the best chance to be able to hear.

Next is listening. If someone is not listening or paying attention to what is being said, they will not hear or understand it. As we grow older, some of us have shorter attention spans and cannot attend to listening to many things for extended periods of time. If hearing loss is involved, it can be straining and tiring to try to hear if they don't hear well.

Others may have an understanding problem. Some people hear well or hear with hearing aids, but they don't understand all that they hear. If someone has an understanding problem, those around him or her need to do everything they can to help.

For all of the above, it is important to remember that the closer you are to the person with a hearing, listening or understanding problem, the better they will hear. Try not to talk to them with your back turned, around the corner, or in the other room. Never try to converse with background noise like water running or the TV or radio turned on. Try to get the person's attention before talking to them.

Dr. Tia Flynn is a certified audiologist and has been in business for over 14 years. Every Tuesday morning from 9 a.m. to noon, Dr. Flynn provides free hearing screenings at 1601 Third St. in Coeur d'Alene. (208) 664-2767.

Visit our newly updated website www.affordablehearinginc.com for an online hearing test and to watch helpful videos.