The Front Row with Tom Hasslinger March 25, 2013

I refuse to do it.

Firstly, I don't take joy in other people's suffering and secondly, I don't have a tremendous ego.

I prefer the high road.

So don't expect a column from me rubbing salt in the Gonzaga wounds after their hoops team was bounced remarkably early in the NCAA basketball tournament again on Saturday.

Sure, people are asking me to, but I won't do it.

"When are you going to write another Gonzaga column?" they ask. They've been asking for two years now.

It doesn't give me a big head. I realize my Zag columns are probably the only thing of mine they've read. I'm OK with catching lightning in a bottle just once. Well, twice if you count the follow up Zag column I wrote after fans sent me hate mail for saying that they were nut-so to think their program was elite even though it's never been to the Final Four.

What am I going to do? Write a column saying 'I told you so' and quote some of the best passages from that 2010 column?

How full of myself would I have to be?

That's why, online readers, I'm not even going to include links to that piece. I'd never ask you to read two of my columns - three if you count the hate mail one. I'm flattered if you even get to the end of this one.

Yeah, I know, still no Final Four appearances for the Zags, even when it appeared the road to get there this year was rolled out like a red carpet.

But on the bright side, Gonzaga gave 16-seeded Southern all it could handle. I'm still not sure if Southern has a campus anywhere or it's one of those online schools you see television commercials for on the high channels after 9 p.m., but still, you have to hang your hat on something.

"Wait a minute here," Zag fan, which is short for fanatic, hollers ...

Calm down. I won't go there, I pinky swear.

The Bulldogs were No. 1 in the nation, after all, and that's no small potatoes.

I know they were No. 1 because the Spokane newspaper devoted the entire front page to the achievement. I didn't read that edition, but I know they did so because they sent a press release the day before saying they would. As a general news reporter, I read press releases.

And if college football has taught us one thing it's that being ranked No. 1 at some point other than the end of the season is equally as important as being champ. OK, wait, that's a bad example.

You see, I am a general news reporter so you can probably tell I don't write much about sports, anyway.

Granted, even when I'm on assignment at political meetings and the like, high-ranking officials occasionally pull me aside and ask if I'm going to write a followup Zag column anytime soon.

"I want to know your preseason prediction," one incredibly important public figure said to me at a recent political rally.

"Sorry," I had to tell him, even though I was touched he took the time to ask during the rally because local political rallies are cram packed with so much fascinating, rational, life-changing discourse that I'm amazed anyone's mind would have time to wander onto trivial topics, like sports.

But now that Gonzaga's season is over prematurely - thanks to Wichita State - I expect plenty of people will continue to ask for another Zag piece, so I want to get ahead of that freight train and say, no way, Jose.

In their defense, it was a pretty good column. I mean, any column that compares the delusion of a fan base to the delusion of a man who thinks the Hooters waitress is hot for him could warrant a followup.

Departing Press city editor Bill Buley, who regales me with stories of old newsroom folklore, told me a story about when the paper used to have a 'writing coach' who would call meetings and read his own stories to the other reporters as an example of great work.

I'm not saying my Zag column - both of them if you count the hate mail one - warrants my own meeting, but I can see how some readers would ask for more. That's all.

So sorry I have to disappoint.

Early tournament losses, even a whole lot of them, doesn't mean the world is ending, anyway. And another bright spot, even though Wichita State isn't a basketball power or anything, most people know where the campus is located. Well, the city anyway, maybe not the state.

Tom Hasslinger is the city reporter for The Press. He can be reached at 664-8176 ext. 2010 or [email protected]