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HAYDEN LAKE: One step closer to gates

| September 29, 2010 12:37 PM

Let's hear it for the Beverly Hills wannabees living on Strahorn between Miles Avenue and Hayden Avenue. Hold on Strahornites, you are almost where you want to be. If this latest effort to keep out the riffraff, meaning the rest of us, doesn't work, you will be only one step away from your ultimate goal of a GATED COMMUNITY.

We, the great unwashed, must bow to the unmitigated gall of the Hayden Lake City Council and in particular Mayor Nancy Morris and my favorite Tom Gorman who resides on the AFFECTED SECTION of Strahorn. Mr. Gorman was allowed to vote on the issue, so say his fellow Council members, because he would not profit from the street change.

I wonder who these fools think they are kidding. First it started with the speed bumps to discourage people from using the street altogether. Apparently that wasn't good enough and now this abortion. The brilliant mayor Morris was quoted in the Press article, "It's one of those situations where we're kind of in between two gates." A possible Freudian slip.

As for me I've given instructions to my real-estate agent and my attorney to find me, my 10 dogs and numerous in-laws, a home in the AFFECTED SECTION. At this point it is my intention to become a serious cause for concern to the Hayden Lake City Council.

I will begin by removing all landscaping in the front of my new home and replacing it with a beach volleyball court. During the summer months, along with my hot dog stand, I will encourage the children residing in the Hillview Drive area to set up a lemonade stand on Strahorn adjacent to the court. Can't you envision the folks stopping by for a cold drink and some conversation regarding the dress standards of the Hayden Lake Country Club members? An example might be, "WOW !! Look at that guy; he looks like Payne Stewart."

It goes without saying that some of the golfers will also pause for some refreshment and will no doubt express a degree of wonderment as to what the hell happened to this once nice-looking home, forcing them to inquire as to just where all these scruffy kids came from. We can only hope that at some point, before my tribe and I move in and become more involved in Hayden Lake politics, the Hayden Lake mayor and her fellow travelers will somehow resurrect their heads from their individual dark zones.

MICHAEL J. MURPHY

Hayden