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'Fast food' gets a new meaning

by Tom Hasslinger
| August 27, 2010 9:00 PM

COEUR d'ALENE - You get a six-inch sandwich, a bottle of water, and a waiver to sign.

The second helps wash down the first, and the last one is to, well, protect the provider just in case there's a hiccup in the formula.

It's competitive eating, a "sport" that has gained national buzz recently, and has found its way to the North Idaho Fair and Rodeo this year thanks to Caruso's Deli

The rules are simple: Eat your turkey sandwich the fastest, and don't upchuck.

And don't choke either, but that's what the water is for.

"We just followed the sandwiches," said Erik Karns, watching his three children racing in the eat off on Thursday. "They said, 'hey want a free lunch?' And we said, 'sure.'"

As it turns out, 10-year-old Julia Karns beat both her brothers Andrew, 6, and Alex, 8, who couldn't finish his half because he loathes tomatoes. No matter, Julia doesn't like pickles but she still clocked an 8 minute 20 second time, a little off the 1:54 fair record.

"I just wanted to beat my brothers," she said, still a little upset about the pickles.

Erik doesn't usually encourage his kids to shovel down grub like that, but when it comes to the fair and food, anything goes.

Fried, grilled, boiled, or sauteed, a big draw for the end of summer tradition is the cuisine. Thirty-five vendors offering sausage dogs, fajitas, double burgers, elephant ears and fried Twinkies is reason enough to visit the grounds, fair-goers said.

It's none too healthy, but that's OK, it's only once a year.

"That's us," said Marty McCormick, admitting that the food is the biggest draw for her family. Marty was sharing an elephant ear with her kids, Emma, 13, and Max, 11, but that was just a sample of the day's menu.

"We start out with the Italian sausage," she said. "Today we worked in a corn dog and now we're on to the elephant ear. I mean, we do something in between to walk it off, but we usually work in the deep fried Twinkie, too."

Not the normal Monday through Friday meals.

But it's the last treat of the summer, Max said, and right around the corner are school lunch boxes filled with milk and apples.

Or as Keith Ekness, grilling pipe-sized sausages at Ekness Catering's stand, put it: "On Monday you can start the diet again."

And as far as a revenue source for the fair, food's no small potatoes. It brings in around $70,000 a year for the fair, which receives a portion of all the sales, said Chris Holloway, fair manger.

But what is it about fair food that makes big, greasy, messy eating so darn romantic?

"It's just so, so, so good," Holloway said.

How so?

"Calories," she said, after thinking about it.

And some of the fares are unique, like the elephant ears. If you don't know what an elephant ear is, go get one right now.

"I've never found one anywhere else," said Marian Schenkenberger, who has visited the fair for around 50 years, and always eats an ear after visiting the exhibits. "If you go to the fair you have to get one."

So if eating is such a big draw, the fair might as well include a speed competition.

The races are twice daily, at 11:30 a.m. and 3 p.m. at the Caruso's space on the far northeast corner of the grounds.

"The key is taking small bites," said Kent Nelson, who won the adult heat of the sandwich race, using a technique he described as pushing the chewed up food against his hand so he can push it back over his teeth and mash it up more for an easy swallow. "And drink lots of water."