Holiday parties getting creative

Remember when “Christmas party” meant simply food, drink, perhaps a little Christmas music competing with conversation? Simple, straightforward. A clean house and canapes and voila, done.

Old school. Think ugly sweater party; if you’ve never attended, you’ve no doubt heard of them. Theme parties are all the rage these days, and ugly sweater is no longer the most common. The online invitation site Evite ranks it No. 3 for 2015, so far. Second place goes to “ornament exchange” (bo-ring!) and “cookie exchange” (diet, schmiet) tops the list.

Not sure what kicked the theme trend into high gear; perhaps Santa-con had something to do with it. If you missed the wire story in Monday’s Press, that’s a bawdy, one-night, Christmas-costumed pub crawl and street party tradition, big in the Big Apple since the mid-’90s.

Less raucous are five more theme parties:

Movie marathon. Haven’t memorized the script to “Christmas Vacation” yet? (Lucky you! Our family has, thanks to its patriarch.) Span a half century from “It’s a Wonderful Life,” “White Christmas,” and “Christmas Story” to “Christmas with the Kranks” and the “The Santa Clause” series. Skip the Bad Santa at a family party.

Reverse Christmas-in-July. Sun bunnies happy about the lack of snow might throw Christmas-at-the-beach party. Invite guests to don Hawaiian shirts, floaties, and sun hats. Smear thick sunscreen on the nose, adorn drinks with mini-umbrellas, and don’t forget the Beach Boys album. Gidget might show up.

Oktoberfest or pan-holiday. Why limit schnitzel and Volksfest to October? Or try the all-encompassing approach: incorporate decor, food, and music from mulitiple December holiday traditions — Christmas, Hanukkah, Los Posadas (Mexico), Celtic solstice, pagan Yule, Buddhism’s Bodhi Day. It’ll inspire uncommon conversation.

Pets in fancy dress. You know they love it: Dress cats, dogs, and snake (why not?) in those stupid reindeer antlers and ugly sweaters. See who’s naughty and nice in a roomful of temptation to growl. Take pictures. What critters will endure for love...

For the more practical, and risk-taking, a re-gifting party. Guests bring whatever they got in years past and didn’t want. Instead of living stuffed in a cupboard, it may see the light of day at someone else’s house. Just hope the giver isn’t on the guest list, or has thick skin.

Here’s a thought for us anti-social types: Be grinchy and skip the whole thing, Luther Krank style. Instead, blow the Christmas budget on a cruise. The kids are grown; they’ll understand. A girl can dream, can’t she?

Sholeh Patrick is a columnist who grows increasingly Scrooge-like with age. To berate and admonish, contact her at Sholeh@cdapress.com.