Fortier
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| Marty Fortier |
Air show legacy to continue
This one should be a dog
We've all heard the old adage: "Fool me once, shame on you ... fool me twice, shame on me."
Well, with the financial bombs from the air show still exploding all around us, yet another high-flying show rolls into town. And as far as I'm concerned, the last thing this community needs is another "Blunder Over the Prairie." That's why I took the initiative, contacted the show chairwoman for this weekend's event, and asked the tough questions.
The following is an actual conversation I had with chairwoman Connie Brunell, concerning the IEKA Event she's responsible for staging at the Kootenai County Fairgrounds this Saturday and Sunday. Connie's responses to my hard-hitting questions seemed to be sincere: however, some of her answers led me to believe she was being advised by a team of attorneys.
FORTIER: Mrs. Brunell, as you are well aware, our community is still reeling from a recent air show that turned out to be a financial disaster, leaving many in the community skeptical about future grandiose events. Any comments about the "Thunder Over the Prairie" Air Show?
BRUNELL: I never heard of it.
(At this point I became skeptical about Mrs. Brunell's candor. How could anyone in the Spokane/Coeur d'Alene region not have heard of the air show? I pressed on.)
FORTIER: Are you trying to tell me that you, a Spokane resident, didn't even know the Hayden Chamber of Commerce was putting on an air show? Come on Mrs. Brunell.
BRUNELL: I had no idea.
FORTIER: So you're saying you didn't know what 12,000 to 40,000 attendees knew? And you had no idea where 3,000 to 6,000 cars were heading that weekend?
BRUNELL: That's quite a spread.
FORTIER: Moving on, Mrs. Brunell. I understand you're bringing in some nationally renowned performers. Exactly how much are you paying these acts?
BRUNELL: They pay us to come to the show.
FORTIER: Really? Well, then is it true your committee pays for the expenses of these prima-donna performers, including the cost of grooming?
BRUNELL: No, our performers have their own entourages that cater to their every desire, be it walking, grooming, or cookies. We even insist that the people handling the performers clean up after them. Our motto is "Stoop and Scoop for your Premier Performer."
FORTIER: Uh huh. OK then, do you have a youth group handling parking at the fairgrounds? And are you planning on stiffing the group after they work all weekend in the hot sun parking cars, thus jeopardizing their chances to finance summer camp?
BRUNELL: No, the youth of America deserves a fair wage. Besides, why would we take advantage of the young people that will some day be running this country?
FORTIER: Umm ... I'll ask the questions here, Mrs. Brunell. Let's talk finances for a minute. Have you in fact raised enough revenue through sponsorships to cover the cost of the event, or are you relying on the "gate" to fund the fees for your pampered performers?
BRUNELL: You're not getting it, are you? Our performers pay us in order to exhibit at the show.
FORTIER: Of course they do. And I suppose the next thing you are going to tell me is that you don't have an attorney on retainer just in case you have to file for bankruptcy immediately after the show. Hmmm?
BRUNELL: Hire an attorney! I wish I had enough money to pay our club members for working the show. We aren't doing this to make money; we do it because we love the dogs.
FORTIER: Dogs?
BRUNELL: Yeah, the IEKA is the Inland Empire Kennel Association. This weekend's event is an "All Breeds Show." It's a great time to see champions perform in the ring, but more importantly, people can learn about the different breeds, and find out what breed might be good for them. What did you think IEKA stood for anyway?
FORTIER: Like I said, I'm asking the questions here.
BRUNELL: Is there anything else? 'Cuz I'm kind of busy.
FORTIER: Uh ... yes, just one more question. Would a Bichon Frise make a good hunting dog?
"Click."
FORTIER: Hello... Mrs. Brunell?
Note to self: Spend more time on research before conducting interviews.
Marty Fortier barely escaped a lifetime sentence in the cutthroat world of big city advertising and marketing. He currently operates a business, writes, and referees his children's fights from his home office somewhere in North Idaho. Marty Fortier can be reached at: mbfortier@icehouse.net.
